Deathbed (Tried to watch 9/30/01)
We have a schlock night first: we took out a movie and put in a new one. Here’s the problem (please don’t repeat it) we thought we were watching Death Bed: The Bed that Eats (1977) what we got was Stuart Gordon’s myopic piece of trash Deathbed (2002). Now if your a brilliant individual like Lucio Fulci you can follow up Argento’s Zombi (a remix of Romero’s Dawn of the Dead) with Zombi 2 because you’ll give your viewers their money’s worth. Or reuse the name Black Sheep because if you thought Chris Farley was funny you’re gonna be even happier when zombie sheep show up in your movies by mail. However, if you’re a shoddy director trying to lure schlock seekers in with plagiarized title you should be nailed to the bare walls you recorded your lame ass movie against. We hate you Stuart Gordon. In fact I might rename this blog Stuart Gordon Sucks. Fortunately we had a copy of Fulci’s The Beyond

Could be good... we'll see.

Avoid this one!
around. See it’s review and tune in soon for the review of the true Death Bed: The Bed that Eats.
Why it sucked: They didn’t water the plants on set, the walls had nothing on them, it looked more like a bad porn set (without the porn), nobody was even remotely interesting
Why it didn’t suck: on our copy the audio track was off by a second and it was fun to watch the actors/actresses lips move and then wonder what would actually be said.
.5 (half)/5 a lame director
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